Category Archives: Christianity and Gender

The Root of the Problem … In My Opinion

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If something, anything, is broken you can attempt to fix it. If you’re successful and manage to fix what was broken that’s great. But what if the fix is only temporary or is susceptible to being broken again? That could be an indication that a permanent solution needs to be found, unless of course you like fixing things. There are people like that.

Years ago, when I was still on the farm, I had a good friend who was constantly “fixing” equipment. One day I asked him why he didn’t buy new equipment that didn’t need to be “fixed” all the time. I said, “it’s not like you can’t afford it because you can. So why don’t you buy new equipment?” His response was very simple,

“You don’t get it. I enjoy fixing things. If I buy new equipment, I won’t have anything to fix anymore.”

Fast forward 40 plus years to today and observe the way Washington works. Is there anyone who can point to any act of congress that actually fixed a problem so that it didn’t need to be fixed again and again and again? The answer to that question is not just no … It’s HELL NO!!!

If a bill introduced in congress was really intended to fix a problem, it would have built into it a date certain for the problem to have been not only fixed, but insure that it wouldn’t be needed again. When was the last time that actually happened?

Some bills are introduced with an end date such as FISA but that end date is just that, an end date. It doesn’t actually specify how it is going to fix the problem that it was created to fix. All it does say is that there is a problem and how the problem is going to be identified. With this particular bill, mechanisms were apparently built in to allow it to be abused. So, right now there is more conversation about how or whether to extend it than to actually fix it so that in X number of years it will no longer be needed.

My question at this point is, how did we get to this point? The founding fathers did anticipate a messy system, but I don’t think they envisioned the nearly dysfunctional system that we have today. Is it fixable? I believe so, but it will take at least a generation if not two generations. Why do I think that?

The root of the problem is buried deep, very deep, in our public educational system. The beast that has been gnawing away at the foundation of our system of government for the last three generations at least is the teachers’ unions. The first teachers’ union, the National Teachers Association was founded in in 1857 by Zalmon Richards. In 1870 the NTA merged with the American National School Association, the National Association of School Superintendents and the Central College Association to become what we now know as the National Education Association, the NEA. It was chartered as it is today in 1907.

Apparently Zalmon only served a few years as president. but records indicate that he continued attending the bi-annual meetings. There is more about his conservative Christian involvements than his union involvement.

The other major teachers’ union the American Federation of Teachers is roughly half the size of the NEA with only about one and a half million members. A merger with NEA in was rejected by the members of NEA most likely due to the influence of Albert Shanker who served as president of AFT from 1974 until his death in 1997. The fact that he was an advocate for Charter Schools, called for a national competency test for teachers, merit pay for teachers and more stringent graduation requirements out to tell you all you need to know about why the membership of NEA rejected the merger proposal.

Fast forward 11 years through Sandra Feldman and Edward J McElroy to Randi Weingarten, a name that should send shivers down the spine of any parent. It took a mere 11 years for everything Shanker worked for to be totally destroyed.

On the other hand the moral rot that is the NEA can be traced back, more than likely closer to a hundred years The time it would take to dig all the way back through the records of the NEA to find out just when the root rot that has become the current NEA is incalculable.

Most people probably didn’t pay much attention to the NEA, which is the way they liked it, until COVID-19 struck. I use that word “struck” because that is basically what the teachers whether they were NEA of AFT did. They essentially “struck” when told it was time take off their sweats and get back in the classroom. An entire generation of children was set back in their education by at least one year if not two.

It’s my firm belief that those two organizations are the tap root of the problems we are seeing in our college campus demonstrations and riots. Not all of the demonstrators are college age but a look at the screen of your TV should give you an idea of the percentages. Those people have not been taught to think for themselves. They have no ability to apply critical thinking to what they are being told. I doubt that the teachers themselves who are currently in the classrooms have ever been taught how to think critically.

So, when some Muslim extremist, or fascist adherent gets to the classroom lectern or on a hastily erected podium on a street corner and starts spewing hateful rhetoric about Jews, in this case, they have absolutely no idea how to objectively research the actual facts before they storm out on to the street. They have never been taught real history. They have never been taught civics. I would be surprised if many of them could do simple math without a calculator.

The parents of those demonstrators bear at least a partial responsibility for the situation. They left the education of their children to the NEA and AFT without paying even a modicum of attention to what was being taught. All they cared about was whether their children were absorbing what they were taught and the proof of that was good grades. I would be willing to bet that 80 t0 90 percent of those demonstrators were “A” students according to the grading system designed by who? You know who.

A stark example of the difference in the effect that educators can have is evident in my own family. My brother, who is 2 years younger than me, and I are both conservative in our political opinions. Admittedly we don’t see eye to eye on various individual politicians, but nevertheless we are products of a more conservative education system and conservative parents. Our sister, on the other hand, is the exact opposite in her political views. She is 14 years younger than me and was educated in a variety of systems including liberal California and Italian systems. That was followed up with 4 years in a liberal college in Colorado. She has been known to threaten to divest herself of her American citizenship when a conservative has been elected as president. I can’t think of a more stark example of the effect of an education steeped in liberal ideology. And she was, by the way, an “A” student.

People like this are so imbedded in our governmental institutions it will take decades to rid the system of their influence. This is all by design.  The design has been crafted by people with one goal and one goal only. That goal is to destroy the best system of government ever created by mankind. Sad to say, but I fear it is all going to lead to a violent disruption of our society and how that disruption ends is, at this point, anybody’s guess.

The one bright spot in the disaster that was COVID-19 is that parents were at last awakened to what was going on in the classrooms they were sending their children to.

A Delayed Response

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Recently, someone close to me asked a question via a text that I felt that more than a return text reply was required because it’s not the first time that question or a similar question has been put to me. Here is the text in it’s entirely.

“I absolutely understand that the GOP stands strong on less taxes, smaller government and their Christian values. I agree. I’m just confused…

“Georgia they hate you. They are anti LGTBQIA!! You are a freak according to them. I despise them for that! You’re a human being. You’re living in your correct body!! You’re authentically you.

How can you support a party that doesn’t see YOU! Doesn’t respect you, doesn’t acknowledge YOU.”

My immediate response is “who is THEY? Apparently, this person is referring to Republicans as a whole. Nothing, absolutely nothing, could be further from the truth. What I have found after years of living in this social environment for nearly 30 years is that as long as I behave like a normal person, which means I don’t expect special treatment, I have experienced only a minimum degree of discrimination. Sure, there are instances when customers suddenly quit communicating with no explanation. Most of those are due to a human reluctance to say no to my proposal. Only rarely have I been aware that one of the people involved indicates a dislike for me by means of demeanor. But to lump every single conservative in that “THEY’ category is on its face absurd.

That, in a nutshell pretty much describes what I would call a single-issue voter, someone who looks at an issue though a tightly focused lense. For some people that lense is focused on abortion rights. For others it may be animal rights or the “green agenda. Whatever their issue is, it always takes precedence over everything else. The better good of the society they live in is totally unimportant.

Why is that?

I’m not certain of the why but I can speculate can’t I. For beginners I think it stems from fear; fear of being wrong. If a person looks at the broad scope of issues faced in our society, and that person finds that broad scope too complicated to be addressed effectively, then the simple solution is to narrow the scope. End result? A single issue voter.

In the above example there was more than just that one issue admitted, but the bottom line was that one single issue carried so much weight in their mind that all the things that affected the entirety of our national security were ignored.

For me, my personal desires are not worthy of the altruistic luxury of considering a single issue when choosing the people and party I cast my vote for. To me that would be an abdication of my responsibilities as a registered voting citizen. Am I ignorant of the segment of conservatism that finds the decisions I’ve made in my life wrong at the least or horribly wrong at worst? Not hardly! But I simply cannot place my personal issues ahead of the greater good, which is what single issue voters do.

The situation that our country is in requires that I look beyond my personal issues to issues that are corroding the very fabric of our society. I look at what has happened in the last 3 years as a result of single-issue voting. The person who I quoted above cast her vote simply because of an attitude toward Donald Trump which is the result of being swayed by hateful rhetoric of the press. For me to cast my vote for any democrat would be for me to abandon my principles which are rooted in the belief of right and wrong. What the democrat party has proven to me is that they have no, I repeat, no moral compass and that oddly enough is what some conservatives accuse people like me of being guilty of.

I’m not going to suggest that I am better than anyone else simply because I choose to buck the majority of my gender community, or any other community for that matter. I am suggesting that I have made my voting decisions based on what I believe is the greater good of our American society, at least the one I grew up in, not necessarily the one I find myself a part of today. It is incomprehensible to me that I could be so totally self-absorbed that I would make such an important decision based on my own personal desires.  So, what kind of society do I find myself a part of today as it relates to me and my lifestyle?

It is a society that has been totally preempted by a radical fringe that in my opinion has, by virtue of their behavior and public pronouncements, (case in point is the trans person who bared her prosthetic breast on the lawn of the White House during the Easter festivities a year ago) put a real target on the backs of those of us who simply want to be a part of society as who we are without special treatments or exceptions. The demands for special treatment and exceptions are being made on our behalf by people who are themselves expressing a childish desire for attention.

Personally, I resent those demands being made “on my behalf”. The people creating these demands have made my world unsafe. Before they stuck their noses in where they don’t belong, I was able to go about my life unconcerned for my safety in public, unconcerned about what people might be thinking of me and resenting me for being what they consider a part of a group which is making demands for acceptance that would have come anyway. But they are setting that acceptance back decades.

Unintended Consequences

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There’s a phrase in our language that I find particularly apropos today. The phrase is “unintended consequences”. I really hope that the current climate which has enveloped the gender identity issue is not intentional, but that hope is most likely futile. What has happened is that the efforts of the vast majority of persons like me to be productive, contributing parts of society are rapidly being eroded by liberal activists whose only goal is to force the rest of society to accept their world view.

How in God’s name have we suddenly become the linchpin of this destructive Godless move to force, by means of intimidation, acceptance of the choices a relatively small segment of society has made? Those choices that have been quietly gaining acceptance for the last twenty plus years have now been set back by a small number of self-important individuals seeking attention.

I have been working and living my life free of the fear of intimidation for the better part of the last fifteen years. Today, thanks to the liberal left I no longer feel the sense of safety and freedom to live the life I have worked to create for myself and for others like me who simply want to be accepted as who we are. Different? Absolutely, but not a danger to the lives of society in general.

So, I’m angry.

I’m angry on any number of levels. The first level is anger at the relatively small number activists who have chosen this time to advance their own personal agendas on everyone they consider narrow minded, conservative Christians and anyone else that tends to agree with that point of view. It is a typical liberal philosophy that they know what is best for everyone else and if you don’t agree with them, you are a threat their existence … literally a threat to their existence as much so as Nazism was a threat to the Jewish people. Those liberals have been educated to think that way without question.

The end result is that the people in our country, indeed the entire world who do question liberal thought and the process by which they arrive at their conclusions, those people are labeled narrow minded bigoted anti-democratic (the government definition not the political party) Nazis. The fact that liberals resort to name calling is itself proof that they are incapable of constructive conversation, and they are incapable of that because they are incapable of constructive thought. Our education system has seen to that successfully enough to have reduced the numbers of thoughtful people to affect the outcome of a national election.

On another level of anger, I find the willing accomplices in our press are ensuring that the advancement of the acceptability of those of us whose bodies do not match our emotional makeup has been set back by decades. And it’s not rooted in the gender variant community as much as it is in persons like Anheuser-Busch’s Alissa Heinerscheid who fancy themselves as being more enlightened than anyone else.

I have no problem with anyone wanting to share their journey in life with anyone who cares to pay attention to them. After all, I did publish a book on my own journey. What little I have seen of Dylan Mulvaney, she does appear to be one of those people whose body and emotional mindset simply do not match. But the mere fact that she allowed herself to be shown in such an unfavorable light casts a shadow on her moral compass. She has contributed to the unexpected backlash besetting Anheuser-Busch … Unintended consequences.

It has been my experience that when we go about our lives like any “normal” person does, that our gender identity becomes pretty much a non-issue. Even people who don’t particularly approve of the choices we’ve made refrain from overt displeasure in our presence.

But the in-your-face approach that Bud Lite has employed with Dylan Mulvaney has created a backlash not only against Anheuser-Busch but against the trans community as a whole. This is what happens when people like Ms. Heinerscheid stick their noses in where they aren’t wanted and try to cram their ideas down other people’s throats. And it’s not just her.

Take the legislator from Montana, Zooey Zepher, who has managed to create a minor firestorm by trying to cram her gender identity issues down the throats of her constituent legislators and the people who voted for them. The mere fact that she was elected to the legislature should be proof enough that had she behaved like an adult and not a rabble rouser she would have probably accomplished far more. What she ranted about was a proposed bill that would ban “gender affirming care” aka gender reassignment surgery for children, which I assume means anyone under the age of eighteen.

Liberals like to cherry pick one or two individuals or circumstances, attach a label to them and then lump entire groups under that label. They simply cannot cope with genuine individuality. The term most often referred to in that case is group think. And group think bans any ideas, thoughts, conversations or efforts at open and fair debate. Liberals simply cannot fathom any idea that runs contrary to, or even slight askew to, the main body of thought which most cannot even track back to the actual origin of the idea.

And that brings us to the subject of group thought about gender identity. Any time I publish something related to my gender identity and/or my political preferences the criticism I receive comes from people in the LGBT(Q) community. It almost always runs along the line of thought that if a person is lesbian, gay bisexual, transsexual or (questioning) they have to be a liberal democrat, because after all they are the only ones who are accepting of the way we live our lives. That is just plain misguided thinking stemming from ignorance. Why is it that conservatives are always the boogie man? And we are now full circle back to group think.

The group has concluded that since they all think alike that conservatives must all think alike. Nothing could be further from the truth other than the desire live our lives independent of the constraints the liberal left would like to place on us, and a general distrust of government. The experience that I’ve had is that while some conservatives may disagree with my choices, they generally accept me as I am as long as I don’t demand acceptance. In some cases, they may choose to consider me misguided and seeking attention. Whatever their feelings on the subject they are almost always willing to have a conversation on the subject. Liberals will inevitably resort to name calling and insults rather than a discussion on merits.

Conservatives, in the LGBT(Q) community are more numerous than one might expect because they don’t wear their politics on their shirt sleeves. And they are most likely to be Christians which is another taboo for liberal progressives in the gay community. But that conversation is for another time. What I want to get across is the idea that conservatives of any life choice have been too eager to compromise in order to express a willingness to avoid confrontation. That has been construed as a number of traits, such as cowardice, lack of compassion, lack of intellect. That willingness to discuss issues has led directly to the liberal left branding us as weak and ineffectual. And they have been very successful in that endeavor.

It’s time for conservative to fight fire with fire … adopt a no prisoners attitude. Compromise has been a total failure and if that isn’t corrected immediately the demise of a wonderful form of government will be on our shoulders. It will be on the shoulders of all conservatives, normal and LGBT(Q). We are the ones who will have to shoulder the blame just like a parent who lets their child run wild without any discipline are ultimately to blame for the outcome of their children’s lives. Liberals do not respect compromise or reason. They only respect power.

Conservative willingness to compromise with the evil of liberalism has had all these “unintended consequences” that have brought us to the brink of collapse.

As for the “T” part of the alphabet soup label. Those of us who are not subscribing to the current disruption of our society by the noisy attention seekers; we need to let the world know that those people do not speak for us. We have paid our dues to be a part of society. The spoiled children who are rioting and their willing accomplices in education and the press have not paid more than a dime in dues to be considered as reasonable people. The backlash which is occurring should have been expected and would have been totally unnecessary. Just ask Anheuser-Busch if they are happy with their

.

Do I really wish I was three again knowing what I know now?

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It’s a question I have asked myself often lately. The news today is rife with stories of teachers, well-meaning or not, encouraging children as young as five or six years old to express a gender identity different from their biological sex. To begin with, I don’t for a minute believe that any teacher should be making those decisions for any child. That is for the parents and the parents alone to address.

But just how do I feel when I consider what my life would have been like if the knowledge, I have today was available when I was five years old?

To begin with, that is virtually impossible for me to imagine, but I can be reasonably certain that I would have been totally confused and bewildered. I simply did not have the mental capacity to even begin to navigate the emotional minefield that one is confronted with, when the mere thought that one’s emotional configuration does not match the physical configuration of one’s body. I had trouble enough as a young adult trying to understand all the implications of what I was feeling. There was no way that I could have dealt with the confusion at the age of five.

So, what age is the right age to begin to deal with gender dysphoria? Short answer … there is no universal answer to that question. The simple fact is that for me, the right age was somewhere in my mid-fifties. Do I think that is the right age for everyone? Of course not. Are there periods of my life that I would like to re-live as Georgia; periods I would like to switch places with George? Absolutely!

But I need to ask this question: would I be better off today if Mrs. Baldwin, my first-grade teacher had taken it upon herself to decide that Georgie would be happier as Georgia and proceeded to implant that idea in my undeveloped brain without my parents’ knowledge? Oh, hell no!! She would have robbed me of experiences and memories that I have of George’s life that no amount of therapy could replace. She would have robbed me of experiences that could only have been available to George but that I can benefit from.

She would have made uneducated assumptions about me, about Georgie that she had no right to make. I don’t even think a lot of parents today have the background or the knowledge to make those decisions for their children. But that is exactly what way too many teachers, who are being goaded by the teachers’ unions (aka NEA and affiliates), are doing without parents’ knowledge much less their approval.

In my presentations to college classes, I preface everything with the statement that when I discuss gender identity there are very few and far between facts and that what I have to say in that regard is strictly my personal opinion. I have been saying that for twenty years and I say it still today. It’s for that reason that I find it terribly wrong for any teacher to take it on themselves to encourage any child to take on a persona that does not match their birth gender.

In a study done in the late 1990s it was discovered that the suicide rate among gender variant individuals was nearly eleven times that of normal individuals. There have been numerous studies done in recent years which points to possibly higher rates than previously thought. A quick review of the subject on Google lists a considerable number of studies on the subject but none address the actual number of actual completed suicides.

Obviously gender identity is becoming a more common topic of discussion, but it seems that it is being affected by a failure to address the need for extreme caution in guiding the young people in our education system toward irreversible actions. I have addressed the irreversible issue in my own life by referencing that decision to Caesar’s decision to cross the Rubicon. It cannot not be undone.

And if I have not made myself clear … No teacher has the right to encourage at the least or to facilitate at most, any gender variant behavior in any child with or without a parent’s approval. Teachers simply do not have the training nor the experience to involve themselves in such a critical issue in a child’s life. That is an irreversible procedure.

So, do I really wish I was three again, knowing what I know now? Nope! Not a bit! The joy I find in life now is the result of a life lived in two genders … two worlds, and guided by God’s impeccable timing.

Are they old enough to know

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The last sentence of the first chapter of Dear Mom and Dad and the last sentence of the book end with a quote from a Hank Ketchum’s classic comic strip character Dennis the Menace. “I wish I was three again knowing what I know now”. The idea being that I would have made different decisions about my life’s direction. I don’t think there are many of us in this world who wouldn’t agree with that statement. We all wish from time to time that life had a rewind button. I bring this up because of an article I read recently in Hillsdale College’s publication Imprimis.

The article was written by journalist and author Abigail Shrier and titled Gender Ideology Run Amok. Naturally, when I saw the title, I felt compelled to read the article in its entirety, something I don’t often do with any article in any publication. But this one I did read all the way through and I’m glad I did because it raised some serious questions about the way decisions are being made on how gender identity is being addressed in our country’s mental health community today.

Shrier points out that in 2007 there was only one pediatric gender clinic in our country. Today there are hundreds. Her question is: How did we get to this point? It’s an important question. The fact that she says gender issues have become a big issue in our schools doesn’t really address how and why it has become a big issue, just that it has become a big and destructive issue which it is. I have my own theory and ideas about it which you can, no doubt, imagine.

Let’s get to the root of the problem, which in my opinion is our educational system and the group that has the biggest influence in in it … the teacher’s unions in general and the National Education Association in particular. The last year and a half of the Corona Virus epidemic has brought that groups true colors into focus. It’s my belief that while a large number of teachers really did want to be teachers with the best interest of the children they teach at heart, there are just as many, if not more who have become teachers with ulterior motives at heart.

A teacher who is not mentally or emotionally capable of addressing the mental or emotional issues they are confronted with in the classroom will inevitably look for a scapegoat to deflect attention away from themselves. Enter into the classroom a child that is struggling with their personal identity. Instead of taking the time to really help the child and the family it is far easier to pin the problem on the current hot button issue … gender identity. That way the problem for the child becomes a way for the teacher to avoid looking incompetent and instead look like a pioneer in childhood gender identity  solutions, which of course the teacher is not.

The fact that I refer to wishing I was three again does not imply that I wish I could have lived my entire life as Georgia. It does imply that I wish could have understood why I didn’t feel “normal” much earlier than I did. The fact that I struggled with feelings of unease in being who I was does mean that in many was I going through what most adolescents go through. I feel for the children today because they are not being allowed to be children. They are not being allowed to develop their own self-image. At the first sign of an identity issue, it’s not being treated as part of the normal growing up process. No, it’s immediately identified as a gender issue that must be treated with the current fad treatment. They and their parents are instantly steered into mostly irreversible decisions.

When I made that decision to transition it was with an adult mind and after more than a few years of self-examination. I could never have made that decision intelligently or with a clear understanding of self as a teenager and I sincerely belief that scant few, if any at all, teenagers today are any different.

In my presentations to college classes about gender identity I try to make a point of saying that gender identity is a matter of learning to know who you are at your core and that transitioning isn’t going to solve any problem that isn’t solved beforehand. I liken it to something I heard repeatedly in AA. Alcoholics have a phrase for people who think that if they just change their location, move from New York to Los Angeles, it will solve the problem that caused them to drink. It’s called “a geographical”. It never works and it doesn’t work because the problem is not external… it’s internal. All you do is drag the issue along with you to a different location. Fix it where you are before moving on.

I think the same principle applies to gender identity. Adolescents are historically known for emotional issues. Encouraging them to believe that it’s because they were born in the wrong body is like a geographical. Psychologists and educators need to understand that they must quit looking to gender identity as the root of the problem. That solution will ultimately create even worse problems in the years ahead. All the gender identity solution is, is today’s way to deflect from a problem as old as mankind … adolescence.

A Vision Is Not Enough …

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12:25 PM August 1, 2021

I would have normally been on way home from worship service at the home of one of New Foundation’s Pastor’s. But not today, and more than likely never again. I have had few things sadden me more. The natural and immediate reaction to the events of the last few months leading to the last 2 weeks is to point fingers and cast blame. While there is plenty of that to go around that is not my purpose here. My purpose is to look back over the last 12 plus years and record events and actions, of the people I have interacted with as a result of my participation in the decisions and actions of the leadership of New Foundation. If that is taken as finger pointing, so be it. But if we are not honest about how we got here then we learn nothing and we are left with nothing.

I wrote about my introduction to New Foundation in very last couple of pages of my memoir. I had been bitterly disappointed in the results of ego driven performances of the leadership of my previous church Healing Waters Ministries and had finally walked away. It shut down shortly thereafter. Two of the people I had known there had persisted in asking me to visit the new church they had found when they walked away. I finally agreed to attend one service.

As I said in my memoir, one look at the face of Jabowa Whitehead and I felt I knew why God had closed Healing Waters. I felt it was because He had been holding open the door of New Foundation Christian Fellowship all along.

It must have been several months before I was invited to the Society of Sipping Saints. Being a recovering Alcoholic who worked weekends in a bar I had no issue with going to a bar with a few of the congregation and the pastors. I enjoyed the social atmosphere with the people I had just worshiped with. It became a regular occurrence. I had never had a social experience like that at any church. It truly gave meaning to the term church “family”. Since Jabow had asked me to take over the communication I found that time a good time to text all the people who hadn’t been in service that morning.

I had some disagreements with Jabowa, most of which were political. For instance, it was about that time when the issue of gay marriage came to the fore in the news and commentary sections of the various media. In a phone conversation with him I voiced my politically conservative opinion on the issue. He quickly informed me that it was extremely important to so that he could marry the man he loved, Pastor Juan.

Over the next few years our congregation grew quickly, and we soon found that we needed a larger facility. I, along with a few others, put in many hours making the necessary modifications to the new facility and soon we had moved from the small second floor rooms across the street to new larger free-standing building with a large parking lot which we needed with a growing congregation. We had room for Children’s Sunday School, and it too was growing.

But a change began to take place in the spiritual environment. I was still happy with all the people, new and old. Pastor Jabowa began adding people to the dais behind him and soon the front of our church began to resemble a holy roller church. I have to admit that I didn’t think some of those he chose should be up there. But I also felt it wasn’t my place to say anything. In addition to that change Pastor Jabowa abandoned his nicely but casually dressed appearance and started wearing a black robe. But we continued to grow.

Then one morning Pastor Juan wasn’t there. At the end of service, Jabowa requested all the leadership to stay behind for a private meeting. He informed us that he and Juan were separating, and that it was the result of 8 months of counseling. Pastor Juan was visiting family in Alaska.

I was personally in tears and stayed behind to tell him how heartbroken I was. I asked him at the time there was someone else in either of their lives. He said, no. I took him at his word. This all occurred in either late February or early March.

It may have been a couple of weeks, but no more when Jabowa told me he was seeing someone else. When I look back on it, I see it as the moment before the fall from grace. I reminded him of what he had said about Juan being the love of his life. He denied having ever said it.

Pride weekend and Sunday morning, when he should have been at the church preparing for the service, he wasn’t there. No one knew where he was, and no one had heard from him. He didn’t respond to text messages or phone calls. Pastor Cherry grabbed her laptop and pulled up a sermon.

The next week half of the congregation was absent. And the week after that half of those were not there. I had the opportunity to ask one of the men, someone I admired for his faith, if he was going to leave too. He responded with, “Yes, God has withdrawn his blessing from New Foundation.” The downhill tumble had begun in earnest. It could have been avoided if Jabowa had only offered some kind of apology and committed himself to a renewed commitment. But he never did.

The church was moved from that building to a conference room at hotel. That lasted for a little over a year. Then we found ourselves meeting to a bar. One of the last times I saw Pastor Cherry she said flatly that “we’ve got to get out of this bar”.

Just before Covid hit Jabowa and his next husband Pastor Freddie announced that we “would be meeting at their home. And that’s where we have been until a week ago when none of the pastors, including the one who was supposed to give the sermon showed up.

I have put all this down because I want to emphasis the importance of a pastor’s devotion to his duty and while no person is perfect, using the excuse that “I’m only human, is merely a way of self-justification for failing in one’s duty. Sadly, I have to say that I heard Pastor Jabowa use that very excuse on a number of occasions.

The word pastor is from the Greek word “poimen” which translates as “shepherd”. I came from an agriculturally oriented family background. My dad had a favorite saying for situations like this: “You don’t go to town when the ox is in the ditch”.

Unfortunately, just as the shepherd who puts his own desires ahead of his responsibility to care for the sheep in his charge, New Foundation has suffered entirely too much from personal priorities been placed ahead of the Shepherd’s duty. Sadly, for all Jabowa’s good intentions and amazing concept for a church configured like the early church before Constantine took over, that original concept of welcoming “all people” and giving them a family that maybe many of them never had, was lost in personality flaws of leadership.

  1. C. “Jabowa” Whitehead was a very loving person and everyone who ever knew him was forever changed. I was blessed to know him and worship with him and share his vision, but a vision alone is not enough. A vision requires effort, dedication, planning, execution of the plan, leadership and unfailing commitment to purpose. If New Foundation is to survive, it needs to be re-born with a commitment by all involved to dedicate themselves to the execution of all these facets of purpose and remember how we got to this place.

Just to Clarify

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A recent communication from a good friend pointed out that a description of some people, in my last blog as “stupid” was probably not the best choice of words and as a result somewhat detracted from the point I was trying to make. In retrospect he was probably correct. I undoubtedly could have been a bit more, well considerably more, diplomatic.

When I was in early sobriety and learning to assess my previous behavior in an honest and forthright manner, I was told in confessing my transgressions that when I followed up my confession with, “but” such and such or so and so did such and such to cause my behavior that I totally negated my personal responsibility in the interaction. So, no “buts” here.

I am angry. And I feel justifiably so. I will apologize for using the term “stupid” but not for the assessments that followed the term. I know that I am only a single voice in the choir and that I have, in that respect, a total inability to carry a tune. But I will not let that keep me from singing as loudly as I can.

All that being said, I need to express an opinion regarding gender identity politics and what I see as a major flaw the thinking of many in our community. That flaw is the idea that everything we express must be expressed from the platform of our gender identity.

When I first became involved the activities of the world of the transgendered, I of course was primarily concerned with being an accepted part of the community. Having always been outspoken about my political views, which by the way included my religious views, I saw no reason to suppress those views just because I was wearing a wig and a dress. I immediately found that, for many in the organization, I was a heretic. After all, conservative religion and politics were joined hand in hand in the denunciation of the transgendered community.

While that was true to a certain degree it was definitely an overgeneralization of the situation. If you have followed my blog over time, you know that I certainly have not let the opinions of those I disagree with stifle the expression of my views. If I had a bigger following, I would probably be banned from Facebook and Twitter, but so far, I have not.

Enter stage right, Caitlyn Jenner.

She is the embodiment of what I have felt and expressed in the past. She is what the transgendered community needs badly because what she is saying, to me at any rate, is that gender identity is not going to keep her from expressing her conservative political opinions. To date I have not heard anything from her that reflects her gender identity. She has been strictly focused on issues that have nothing to do with gender; issues that affect average people in her state. If her gender identity is brought up it’s the interviewer who brings it up and not her. So, what if her transgendered status draws attention. It has nothing to do with what she feels the people of California need from the point of view of a very successful businessperson.

She should be an example to the transgendered community to put gender identity aside and be a contributing member of society … like any “normal” person would do without making gender the issue.

My parents never expressed an opinion of anyone based on issues they had no control over, ie … skin color, sex, physical handicaps. As a result, I learned to look at the character of people in my life. Did Caitlyn have a choice to visibly express her gender identity? Absolutely! But she had no choice as to the set of emotions she was born with and that is what she is expressing in her appearance … and to my way of thinking, an expression of her character.

In closing this blog entry what I want to say is, to our transgender community, stop with the gender identity excuses for not living up to your potential. Stop with the gender identity excuses for thinking you are a victim. Stop parroting the opinions of those who are telling you that you are a victim. There are no victims here, only people who have been convinced they are victims by those who need victims to support their own self-centered aims of controlling other’s lives … since most of them, from what I see, have had trouble controlling their own.

Dear Mom and Dad, P.S.

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P.S.

A lot has changed since I last wrote to you … a lot! I hardly know where to start. But, I’m going to give it a try.

I’ll start with what’s happened in the nation in general. The panic over the nation of Islam and the terrorists it spawned has pretty much subsided. We endured eight years of a Democrat in the white house who was elected primarily because he’s African American on his father’s side. And then re-elected because the Republicans nominated a gutless wonder by the name of Romney.

The damage of that eight years was nearly irreparable, but one of the most unlikely people to be nominated by the Republicans and then elected president, Donald Trump began cleaning up the swamp. The only reason he doesn’t have a lock on election this time around is a Chinese originated virus that has killed over 150,000 people. The democrats and their willing accomplices in the press have done a pretty thorough job of blaming him even though he was the first president to stand up to the Chinese and begin the process of renegotiating all of the previous administrations’ bad trade deals. I can’t help but wonder if the Chinese didn’t deliberately spread the virus world-wide in order to derail those talks.

Now the democrats have swung so far to the left toward a near totally socialist agenda that even Granny would have to vote Republican, and you remember what die hard democrat she was. You should ask her about it. I’m sure she’s around up there somewhere.

So much for that. In my world, things have changed a lot too. After my letter to you was published with visions of royalties just pouring in and offers of a movie deal coming in by the day, I started working weekends at bar in Phoenix called The Cash Inn. And no, I didn’t start drinking again. I just liked being there and made a lot of friends there over the ensuing 5 or 6 years. The owners at the time Lisa and Adele, especially Lisa were some of my biggest supporters.

I got a considerable amount of support from others in the LGBT community. Keith, who I identified as “Keifer” hired me to help him re-model two houses. Unfortunately, he died suddenly one day owing me a substantial amount of money and his partner refused to pay me the balance.

Then I went to work doing remodel and repair work on another bar, Plazma in Phoenix. I got to know the owner Jim through my pastor, Jabowa Whitehead. We used to go over there after church on Sunday afternoon and spend time getting to know other people in the church. At one time Jim gave me an advance on work I hadn’t done yet so I could buy books to sell at a college in California. Which brings me to another person; someone who has become just about the best friend I’ve ever had, with one exception, that of course being The Blue Magnet.

I have to admit that I don’t remember exactly what year it was when Christine Curtain, The Little Green-Eyed Blonde introduced me to Jimmy Urbanovich, but it had to have been at least eleven or twelve years ago. Since that time, he and his wife Renee’ have become not only important supporters but have also become good friends. Jimmy has invited me back to speak at Crafton Hills College in Yucaipa every year but this year and that being the result of Covid-19. Renee was instrumental in getting a promotional video produced by her son for me to use, in an effort to book speaking engagements, but before any could be arranged Covid-19 hit.

However, the really big, I mean REALLY big events of my life have been one event leading to another, leading to another.

Seven years ago, this last June my financial situation had become desperate. I had been applying everywhere for jobs; Circle K, Quick Stop, Walmart, Lowe’s and Home Depot just to mention a few. I was really desperate. The leasing agent I leased my townhouse from had given me notice that they would no longer accept post dated checks for half of my rent. It was either pay all by the third of each month or face eviction. I would have taken any job offered at that point.

The last Monday in June I received an e-mail from The Home Depot central hiring in Atlanta. It said they had attempted to call me for an interview the previous Friday, but I had not answered. Was I still interested in applying for a job there? I couldn’t dial the number fast enough. After an initial phone interview at that time an interview was scheduled for 8:00 AM the following Tuesday at Depot 469 in Mesa.

My interview with ASM Vicki went so well that she asked if I could possibly return for an interview with the Specialty ASM Jeremy the next day. I said “Of course.” Then she asked if I was willing to come back that afternoon. “Heck, I’ll wait if it’s this afternoon.”

She responded that Jeremy wouldn’t be in until 1:00 PM. So, the appointment was set for 2:30 that afternoon. Jeremy and I talked twenty minutes or so and then he took me out to the kitchen showroom and asked me to sell him every product they had. I honestly don’t think he believed that I had as much experience as I did. At any rate he said he would call me the next day. I thought, “Sure you will.” Several years before I had been told that by another Home Depot and never heard a word. But, he called me the next day and said I was hired.

My first official day was July 17, 2013. I anticipated a year or so at The Home Depot. But seven years later and I’m still there.

In the meantime, Mom passed away the last week of September 2014. After all was settled and her home sold, I was the recipient of a third of her remaining estate. On my way home from Utah after having emptied her home of seventy-five years of memorabilia, treasures and personal things of no value to anyone but family, I realized that something I had thought would never be possible, would be.

I had been living and working as Georgia for more than seven years even though the name change hadn’t been legally official until January 5, 2009. At the court hearing for the name change, when it was my turn to stand before the judge, he looked over the papers, and then looking at me said, “I think this is very appropriate. Petition granted.”

I had been on hormone therapy for almost as long and had become used to the idea that whatever was under my skirt wasn’t nearly as important as what was in my heart and head. So, with the realization that a complete transition was now possible, but also having witnessed the tragic result of hasty decisions in regard to Gender Reassignment Surgery I decided to take my time and be sure it was the right thing for me to do. So I waited and I considered all the implications of what I was contemplating.

The first person to learn of what I was considering was Christine. The first Thanksgiving after we met, I had spent with her and family and friends. After all the hoopla was over and everyone had departed and we were alone I had asked her if it would make any difference to her, regarding our relationship if I ever did take that step. Her reply was, “Of course not and she would go with me wherever I needed to go and hold my hand as long as necessary.”

I called her sometime in the middle of December and asked her if the promise was still good. She said, “Of course.” I told her I hadn’t made a firm decision but was thinking about it.

I waited until sometime in February to contact Dr. Marcy Bowers. Over time I had always known that if I ever took that step, she was the only surgeon I would consider. That was because she, herself was a transsexual and had taken over the practice of Dr. Stanley Bieber in Trinidad Colorado.

My first appointment with her was on March 30th, 2015. I still wasn’t sure that I wanted to go ahead and planned on waiting another couple of months before I made a final decision.

Naturally I gave her a copy of “Dear Mom and Dad” when she entered the examination room and after introductions she asked me if I had any questions for her and I said,

“Am I too old?”

“Why do you think you are too old?”

“I’m seventy years old.”

“You’re what?”

“I’m seventy years old.”

“When I first saw you, I assumed I was dealing with someone in their mid-fifties.”

I could have kissed her right then and there.

But to answer my question, she said that I wasn’t too old. She had performed the surgery on people in their eighties.

As the interview was winding down, she said that her good fortune was my misfortune because she was booked out for two and a half years. My heart sank. Then she added, “But for you, I will get you in within nine months if I have to work an extra day of the week.”

Before I left the office, I filled out the necessary paperwork and left a deposit.

About two weeks later I got a call from her practice manager, Robin. She was calling to verify my insurance information that Aetna was my primary through my employer and that Medicare was secondary. I told her yes but that I didn’t want Home Depot hassled about coverage; I had the money.

Robin said she didn’t know what I had heard but that they didn’t hassle the insurance company. All they did was send a letter asking if it was a covered procedure. I said that if that was all they did then fine, but the answer would be “no”. Then I went on with my life.

The last week in June, I was preparing to go on vacation in Monument Valley and Durango when I received a letter from Aetna. There’s my denial of coverage letter I thought. I opened it up and started reading. In the middle of the page was the following:

“Gender Reassignment Surgery: Covered procedure.

What? No! That can’t be right. I folded it up and put it back in the envelope. I waited a few minutes and took the letter out again and re-read it. Yup! That’s what it said. “Gender Reassignment Surgery: Covered Procedure”

I called Robin the next morning and told her about the letter and asked if she had been notified. She said no, but they usually didn’t hear until a week or so after the patient did. So, I went on vacation and returned to work on a Thursday in mid-July. The next day, Friday, Robins office was closed at noon, so I e-mailed her and asked if she had received confirmation of coverage.

Monday morning, about 10:00 my phone rang. It was Robin. She said yes, they had received a confirmation from Aetna and that all I owed was $4,000. Then she said,

“So, how about September 2nd?

“For what?”

“Your surgery.”

I was speechless. I couldn’t breathe. Finally, Robin said,

“Are you there?”

“Uh Yeah.”

“Do you want that date?”

It took a few seconds for it to sink in; that the final decision moment had arrived. I finally said, “Yes, I do.”

“Do you want Dr. Beck to do the breast implants at the same time?”

“If it’s going to happen that soon, yes I do.”

“Then the date is September 1st.”

It had been just five months since Dr. Bowers had said she would get me in in nine months if she had to work an extra day of the week. I called Christine and told her I was making plane reservations for August 31st.

The only other thing I’m going to add is this; I had not been anesthetized since I had my tonsils out when I was 5 years old. I had no idea what to expect. The anesthetist came in to pre-op and said he was going to give me something to relax me, then something to put me to sleep and then would use general anesthesia for the surgery which all together would last six to seven hours.

The next thing, I’m awake and wondering when are they going to get started? Then,

“Oh crap, it’s all done!”

Then, what I knew was possible but didn’t think would happen to me, happened.

“Oh my God, what have I done. I’ve made a horrible mistake.”

But there was no turning back now. I had crossed the Rubicon. I immediately went to work on my own emotions and within two hours I was okay and have never looked back since. It was the right thing for me … Georgia.

George? He’s still there … in my subconscious now just as I was in his for sixty plus years. And he gets in his two bits worth from time to time just like I did to him.

It was not quite a year later that the love of my life, Georgia’s life, entered my life and has made me happy beyond belief. The Blue Magnet makes every day memorable and generally fills it with laughter.

If you are new to my blog, you can read about her and our relationship in posts of February 21st, 2017 and again September 3, 2018.

And the last thing of importance, though tragic, has been the untimely death of my pastor, brother and friend, T.C. “Jabowa” Whitehead. A blog entry on June 2 of this year is a tribute to him. His importance in my life is one of the very last things I wrote about in “Dear Mom and Dad.”

Well, Mom and Dad, that’s pretty much all that’s happened in the last 8 years and not that I don’t look forward to seeing you, I’m just not ready to call it quits down here. I still have books to write and I haven’t had near enough time with The Blue Magnet yet.

Love,

Georgia

P.P.S. And oh yeah … I’ve been ordained an Elder in my church and have actually delivered 3 sermons in the last 2 months, not to mention a lot of introductory messages over the last 4 or 5 years. You can catch them on my Facebook page when you have time.

Frustration is turning to Anger

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My frustration is turning to anger. Maybe the final straw was seeing a mob; that’s the only word for it; pulling down a statue of Francis Scott Key in San Francisco. So what if he was a slave owner. If what I recall of my education is correct; and I’m pretty damn sure it’s because the NEA hadn’t corrupted the system yet; most of the signers of the declaration of independence were slave owners. My guess is that there wasn’t a single one of those fools involved in the destruction of that statue that’s had any seriously accurate education in our history.

It’s highly unlikely that any of the people who did own slaves were the ones to go to Africa and kidnap the people they “owned”. The slave traffickers in many cases weren’t even the ones to kidnap the people they trafficked in. In most cases the unfortunate people to be sold into slavery were captured and sold by other black tribesmen or Arab Muslim slavers.

But all that knowledge is secondary to the root cause of all the turmoil in our country. That root cause is total and complete lack of basic education and sense of responsibility for one’s own actions. Parents are turning the education and upbringing of their children over to the state. And the cities and states that are the most affected with the problem are those run by liberal politicians like Bill DeBlasio of New York City.

I know that conservative news and commentary outlets see this, but why don’t people on the left at least give lip service to the issue? Can it be possible that they really don’t want to see it because it’s such a glaring example of what liberal progressivism does to the soul of the communities it has taken root in? I tend to think that is the case.

Everything Marxism and Maoism teach is on full display with each and every march and riot that’s occurring on a daily basis. Has our education system become so badly directed that the average person is totally convinced that they owe nothing to the society they live in and that the government is there to provide them with not only the necessities of life but all the goodies that come from a free enterprise form of economy?

So yes, I am angry that people I know, people I care about and people I love are so totally ingrained with an attitude of hatred toward everything that has made this country the one place on the face of the earth where everyone wants to live.

I’m angry that everything about this country that I love and hold dear has become a target of hatred and a form of reverse prejudice.

I’m angry that the press in general, the liberal politicians, the entrenched bureaucracy in Washington, the public education system have all been co-opted by the notion that only a relatively few elites have the vision and correct idea of what is right and what is wrong.

I’m angry that those same people who have made common sense a thing to be laughed at and belittled, are the ones making decisions that affect my life and the pursuit of happiness embodied in our declaration of independence.

And I’m angry that those people who are supposed to be the defenders of free speech; the educators, the liberal politicians and most of all the press, think that I am ignorant because I am a Christian, a politically conservative Christian, a politically conservative Christian trans-sexual; that since I’m all these things, I can’t have an opinion worth voicing.

I could go on indefinitely about what started out as frustration and has now become anger and how that anger makes me want to lash out, but I don’t believe that’s productive, so I won’t.

If you’ve read this far, I think you get my point. I’m angry.

Jabowa

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I don’t know quite where to start. So I will start with a passage from the next to last page of Dear Mom and Dad …

“Within minutes of walking in the door, I felt that I knew why God had closed the Healing Waters door. He’d been holding open the door of New Foundation Christian Fellowship for me all along. I was home at last. I sensed blessings of our maker in the face and presence of everyone, but most of all Pastor Jabowa Whitehead, in a way I’d never felt before in any church. The peace and sense of purpose we’d searched for all our combined life was finally ours.”

Yesterday evening June 1st 2020 at 5:33 and 59 seconds Thomas Cohen “Jabowa” Whitehead took his leave of this world and in so doing left in his wake a multitude of lives much better off for having known him and having been loved by him. And I say “loved” by him because he did love everyone who entered the sphere of his life.

I have met many people who claimed to love everyone, but there has always been a somewhat hollow tone to their claim. Not so with Jabowa. He did genuinely “love” everyone in his life. It was that quality that allowed him to change in some way every life he touched. When one loves as genuinely and completely as did Jabowa Whitehead one cannot help but leave a lasting mark on the lives one touches.

I will never forget the first moment I saw Jabowa. I had been talked into attending a church service for which I held no expectations or even hopes of some healing sense of what I would experience there. As I entered the “Upper Room” as I came to refer to the place on 16th Street and Osborne in Phoenix, he was busy at the front of the room but he glanced up and flashed that Jabowa smile at me. It was a brief but knowing smile that said, “I’ve been expecting you.”

Was our relationship flawless and without chuck holes? No, of course it wasn’t. In fact, at one point I walked away from New Foundation convinced that my time there was at an end and it was time to move on, so I did. But, true to his character, 4 months later I got a text from him. It said he would understand if I chose not to, but he wanted me to know that he would like it if I would worship with him the following Sunday. I responded that I would talk to Abba about it and if He said I should, I would. On Saturday I received another text from him asking what the answer was. I responded that Abba had been totally silent so I took that to mean that He was leaving it up to me so I would probably be there. And I was.

I have not looked back since then. A testament to what he had created was the reception I received when I entered the room, not from him, but from the “family” I found there overwhelmed me. It took awhile for the two of us to heal our relationship, but he had such a forgiving and loving heart that I had no choice but to forgive and heal.

It is important for people who read this to understand what Jabowa’s vision for New Foundation was, as he shared it with me.

It was first and foremost a place for everyone to worship. No formal membership required. And by “everyone” he sincerely meant “everyone”; the broken, the cast offs of society and organized, mainstream churches. As he frequently put it, “gay, straight, trans, bi, Methodists, Baptists, Pentecostal, or as he would phrase it, Methobapticostals; All had a home at New Foundation Christian Fellowship.

The second part of his vision was a fellowship in the form of what the early church was like before Emperor Constantine of Constantinople had his vision of the cross before his victorious final battle with Rome and attributed that victory to the God of the Christians. That vision led ultimately to the Holy Roman Catholic church and the endless requirements of organized Christianity today.

The Christ of Jabowa’s faith was a friend and a brother to be talked to and listened to on a nearly continuous basis. I wrote in Dear Mom and Dad that none of us is ever going to be completely privy to another’s relationship with our maker, and as open as Jabowa was with his faith and his prayer life his most intimate relationship with God is something none of us will ever know.

When I try, through the tears, to understand why he was called home so soon I can only think of it this way. In a forest there can grow a giant pine tree and over time it sheds many cones which lie dormant for years never giving rise to new trees. Only when a forest fire destroys that tree does the heat from that fire cause the many seeds the tree has shed over its lifetime, to break open and germinate. Only then does the promise of a future for other life to grow, uninhibited by the shadow of the giant tree.

The giant tree, in the person of Jabowa Whitehead, is no longer here among us, but we as the seeds of his love and acceptance must now germinate and give life to his vision. His vision must now be our vision. His mission must now be the mission of every life he ever touched.